St. Patrick’s Day always brings out a festive mood in folks but sometimes the temptation can be too much especially for telecommuters. One of the quickest ways to get fired is to get caught drinking on the job.
If you’re looking to consume alcohol on company time consider setting your career sights on one of the following positions:
Rock Star – Most establishments don’t mind the evening’s entertainment running a tab while they’re working. Sometimes the band even ends up paying to play after the total is tallied. Depending on your level of celebrity, the bar where you are performing might even pick up the check. It’s not how much you make though, getting to put “Rock Star” as your occupation on all of your paperwork is payment enough.
Brewmaster – An epic title many people would love to have. A brewmaster is not just a beer taster but the boss of the entire brewery. This position requires knowledge in chemistry, engineering and agriculture. The process involves schooling and accreditation as well as bragging rights that will make all of your buddies jealous.
Mixologist – More than just a bartender a mixologist is an expert drink maker. They are educated in an assortment of recipes and are called upon to create new ones. You can’t tell it is good if you don’t taste it though so sip and swish until you get it right.
Restaurant Critic – Someone who writes reviews must take in the entire ambiance of the eatery they are visiting as well as paying special attention to the food itself. Most often meals are made to be accompanied by a particular beverage like wine or beer so critics can’t skip the spirits. They can write claim their entire check as an expense and dinner is on Uncle Sam.
Undercover Cop – In order to avoid drawing attention to their non-alcoholic law enforcement may be required to drink on duty if the identity they've assumed demands it. Hopefully it doesn’t turn into a habit. Remember the movie Rush with Jason Patrick and Jennifer Jason Leigh? Yeah, no one wants to see it go there.
Sales – Execs learned long ago that whatever it is you’re selling, it’s easier bought when booze is involved. Many salespeople have business accounts to cover wining and dining clients as well as the cab ride home.
Host – Radio and television personalities are frequently allowed exceptions to slosh it up while working. It loosens up the banter and allows for shocking unexpected situations to surface. Think David Letterman drinking all Julia Child’s cooking sherry while doing a segment on his late night talk show.
Reality Show Personality – People, like the cast of Jersey Shore, who rise to fame by allowing their life to be filmed are often encouraged to be intoxicated. They get paid to be blazed and all it cost was their dignity.
Priest – Nowadays clergy are only allowed a sip per service but historically church figures were charged with making and distributing wine and beer.
Whatever career calls to you, find something you enjoy doing more than just drinking. Professionals who are permitted to indulge realize it’s a responsibility and take their jobs very seriously, unless of course it’s Snooki.
If you feel you have a problem with alcohol abuse find help.
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